Jani Martinius

Tender, Love & Care

I had a massage therapy appointment last week and it was absolutely wonderful.

I am a go-getter type of person, if I do something, I do it 100%, hard. Naturally, the same must apply to a massage, right? I have been through many sessions that felt more like a torture chamber, than relaxation because I thought, if it doesn’t hurt, it’s not really helping. This attitude has its moments, but it often gets in the way of living life in a more gentle, and easeful way.

This practitioner is my absolute favourite, it is such a beautiful and cared for experience, the quality of touch is the “strong hands, gentle touch” sort of way that melts my tension away. She taught me that even while my sore muscles are being untangled, it can be a relaxing, calming and rejuvenating experience. That was news to me!

So last week, my body was stiff, achy and giving me tension headaches. My first thought was to ask for a nice deep tissue massage (the torture chamber type), to really work out those kinks. By the time I walked into the space the coziness, soft music and calming energy enveloped me and I knew to just trust and settle into myself and the experience. My therapist is magical, and I knew she would do exactly what I needed most:

1. A fully heated massage table (like a full body hot water bottle – what a dream!)

2. Tender, love, care, and kindness, towards my tired body and my soul. What I thought I needed, and what I really truly needed were complete opposites.

I think we could all use more TLC on a daily basis. We are our worst and harshest critics. We often don’t afford ourselves the same “luxuries” (aka basic care) that we encourage other people to enjoy. We take care of ourselves last, even though we should be first. We work hard, take care of everyone and still judge ourselves for not getting everything done.

I am so grateful to have found this magical being, who taught me that gentleness is more effective and way more enjoyable than forcefulness. I bet this applies to most things in life.

This leaves me with questions to take into the next week:

How can I create the most gentle day for myself while still doing everything I want / need to do?

How can I set myself up for success without burning out?

How am I taking care of myself, to rejuvenate and re-fill my cups and spoons?

Which thoughts and behaviours can I let go of that are not serving me anymore?