Words have power. Power so great that they influence everything we do and even the outcome of our experiences. They can even help set us up for success or failure. It's the law of attraction in practical, everyday terms.
Quite often, we undertake "positive self-talk" that we think will be enough to override the "negative" that we perceive is surrounding us.
That's great and certainly important. However, there are sneaky little bits of negativity embedded into many seemingly positive phrases.
We may such things as "It doesn't matter if I make a mistake." That can translate to the subconscious as “I make a mistake.” The subconscious is so cooperative that before you know it, you’ve made even more mistakes. We may be struggling with issues surrounding mistakes, and so we are reinforcing any negative feelings about mistakes. We could adjust the phrase and say, "I am in the process of improving my ability to..." or whatever suits your brain better.
The words we choose to say have influence on behaviour.
Saying things like "don't forget" may actually lead us to forget, as it programs our brain to forget.
Remember to say "remember" as it programs your brain to remember.
My husband had something to do and wanted to make sure he took a certain thing with him. So for a whole week, it was "don't forget the ..." He got all packed up and went off to where he needed to be. Fortunately, it was a short drive, as the next call I got was from him (laughing) saying, "guess what, I forgot"?
The subconscious is a little like a petulant two-year-old. It does not have a sense of humour, and it does not understand the words "no," "can't," "don't," or qualifiers such as "it doesn't matter if...".
The subconscious only understands absolutes and goes about making it happen for us since that is what it thinks we want.
In addition, since the subconscious doesn't recognize the word "no," the current use of the terms "no worries" and "no problem" translates to the subconscious as worries and problems. When we say these phrases, we are actually inviting worries and problems into our minds. The subconscious being what it is, will find ways to bring these into being. It's as much a part of the law of attraction as anything else.
Not only that, the best response when someone says "thank you" is to say "you're welcome." It keeps the good vibes going.
It will take some effort to change the words and phrases you use on a daily basis.
But you can do it! There are lots of little reminders you can set, such as the old "snap a rubber band on your wrist" option. Ouch! Or, a less painful and more fun choice could be to have your friends and family listen in and give them the permission to correct you (but make it mutual for fairness, ok?).
It'll take a little time, and you may regress into the previous word patterns. Be kind to yourself. Be patient. You may find that you need to write out alternative phrases. When I first became aware of the "no worries" phrase, I wasn't sure what else to say. It had become such a habit that I was lost. So, I took a little quiet time and wrote out some options. I tried them out. Sometimes they worked. Sometimes they didn't. Nothing "bad" happened when they didn't work. I only got odd looks from people. Oh, well. We are all on a journey, and we are all learning and developing.
Take stock (or make it into a game with your friends and family) of the sneaky little negative or other phrases that creep into conversations and sabotage your subconscious mind. Remember, keep it friendly.
Next thing, start working on changing these phrases. It could be simple - change "don't forget" to "remember," or write out options for "no worries."
Have some fun with phrases! Cook up something different. Take it out for a test drive. Yeah, I know I mixed my metaphors! See what happens. You never know what cool positive phrase you might come up with.
Have fun and enjoy the new positive changes that come with a cooperative subconscious.
Rev. Shirlee Rankin has been a therapist, educator, and speaker for over 30 years and is an Advanced Soul Realignment Practitioner, Ohana Generational Healing Practitioner, Reiki Master, Crystal Practitioner, Animal Communicator, and is an Ordained Metaphysical Minister.
Through years of dedication and study in various physical and metaphysical streams, she is dedicated to helping people discover their Divine Life Purpose and assists couples and families with Soul Realignment, Relationship Readings, Healing family traumas, and performs crystal and reiki treatments for both people and animals.
Shirlee is now called to help in a new way by becoming a metaphysical minister and offering her services as a counselor, wedding officiant, and celebrates life transitions for both people and pets.