It takes stamina, time and energy to take part in meaningful, satisfying relationships. You want to be able to spend time together.
You need to have energy to do things together.
You must have the mind set to be present for each other.
When you are tired, stressed or in pain, you will not be able to give the relationship your all.
So let us start with proper, restorative sleep.
Of course it is important to have good sleep hygiene. If we go to bed at 1 am, it does not matter how much we sleep in, it is not going to be as restorative to our body as getting to bed before 11 p.m., because if you look at the Chinese body clock you will see the body functions that restore during the night start at 11 p.m. How many night owls do you know who have had gallbladder issues?
So you say “I’m too worked up to go to bed, or my muscles are tense, or I just cannot fall asleep when I go to bed.” Sleeping pills are not the answer. But you may try some of the following:
Take some melatonin. This is a hormone that gets depleted, as we get older and is needed for health and sleep. You can start with 3 mg, and increase to 30 mg if necessary to get you to fall asleep.
Another good supplement is Ornithine. Magnesium (Citrate, Glycinate, etc.) helps relax muscles that have tensed up throughout the day so you can relax. We need magnesium for many body functions. Sleep is one of them. A good brand is Natural Calm.
Some Lemon Balm or Chamomile tea is a great relaxer at bedtime.
One of the things that robs us of sleep is screen time in the hour before bed. Yes the blue light tends to stimulate our brain and disturb the circadian rhythm of our body, preventing us from falling asleep when we go to bed.
Reading from a print book rather than onscreen is more conducive to sleep. The blue light of a screen can disturb sleep cycles significantly. As a matter of fact avoiding T.V. watching or computer work for an hour before sleep will help with sleep.
Removing all electronics from your bedroom such as TVs, cell phones, electronic alarm clocks and wireless phones is important not just for sleep but also to reduce exposure to harmful EMF radiation. As a matter of fact, turning off the WiFi in your house for the night will help you sleep better.
Parasites are a common sleep deterrent. Getting a microscopic plaque analysis can diagnose parasites in your mouth and a live blood analysis or a stool sample test can test you for intestinal parasites. They are much more common than we like to admit because we eat sushi, raw tuna, cuddle and kiss our pets, travel to tropical countries, sit on beaches, eat certain foods and drink certain water (Montezuma’s Revenge).
Parasitology is a very neglected branch of medicine. I find parasites are often a hidden clue in the symptoms that clients come in with.
Your energy level of course will be determined by what you eat, what toxins you are exposed to, how much exercise you get and your stress levels.
If you have been exposed to every vaccine going, have used antiperspirants, or have had “silver fillings”, your heavy metal levels are probably very high.
If you sit behind a desk at a computer all day working at a job you hate, you will not have the oomph to go dancing all night or going on a hike with you partner.
Coffee, alcohol and energy drinks will just deplete your stores much faster.
So a walk in the woods, adequate E protective devices and learning stress reducing techniques such as self hypnosis and EFT will go a long way in keeping stress from interfering in your relationship efforts.
Pain is one of the greatest energy robbers of all. Whether it is a whiplash injury, or Migraines or Fibromyalgia, or carpal tunnel syndrome, there are natural, non-surgical, non-invasive therapies that can eliminate the pain. Seek them out with a practitioner trained in modalities such as ozone, Pulsed electromagnetic Frequencies, Polychromatic Lights and Soft laser, to eradicate the pain and give you a new lease on life and relationships.
And of course if you are incompatible, no amount of sexual attraction will keep your relationship satisfying and vibrant, for long. Differences in your attitudes about money, religion, traditions and lifestyle will eventually interfere in your satisfaction with your relationship. Divorce is very hard on all involved but especially the children. That is why the traditional engagement time before marriage created much more stability in relationships and reduced the frequency of divorce due to surprises such as gross incompatibilities. Now there is testing available not just for genetic issues, but psychological and personality compatibility. Psychologists who do personality and compatibility testing for careers also have tools for personality compatibility. Why not do all you can to check things out before you move in together?
The old adage of “an ounce of prevention is worth a lb of cure” applies here very suitably.
Oksana M. Sawiak DDS. IMD. MAGD. AIAOMT
Author, Lecturer, Wellness Consultant
Dr. Sawiak practiced family dentistry from 1966 to 2008 and for the last 30 years focused on mercury-free/biological dentistry.
Today she lectures in biologic dentistry, non-surgical natural gum treatment, pain control, wellness and detoxification and has authored 2 books.
Dr. Sawiak constantly adds to her vast knowledge in order to serve her clients ever more completely. In 1989, she was the first woman in the world to achieve a Mastership in the Academy of General dentistry and in July 2011 attained her Doctor of Integrative Medicine. Dr. Sawiak practices as an Integrative Wellness Consultant at the Sawiak Integrative Wellness Institute in Georgetown Ont.
For further information go to
and sign up for her monthly updates.
Image: Khamkéo Vilaysing