I watched a romance movie this morning - to be fair, I watch a lot of romance movies now - there was a time, however, when I couldn’t sit through one and gravitated towards darker genres.
When I was younger, I read many romance novels and watched my fair share of romantic movies. It was absolutely my favourite genre - head in the clouds, I approached my love life with stars in my eyes and a song in my heart, so it was a perfect fit.
After my divorce however, I couldn’t pick up a romance novel or watch romance movies, feeling that there is no such thing as a happily ever after - I sure as heck didn't want to read or see the love life of the lead characters - but we’ve entered the era of the Hallmark Channel and all of a sudden we’ve got love and happy endings every day on the TV… all day, every day.
I could have turned away, changed the channel or grumbled my way through the movies, but, wanting to embrace more positivity in my life - I allowed myself to once again gravitate towards the romance genre - in the beginning, I had to resist the urge to throw my coffee cup at the screen and call BS when the final kiss indicated all was good in lead couple’s world. But now… now I smile and let in the hope that maybe… just maybe… I can find my happily ever after.
I’ve also begun re-reading some of my favourite novels - letting myself be swept away in the story, they now sit on my bookshelf, not in a bin in the basement - to be enjoyed again if the mood strikes.
Older and wiser, I want to be more realistic in my approach to romantic relationships. I understand that no one is perfect and life is always going to throw you curve balls but
I’ve also learned that killing the part of me that wanted to believe in happily ever after didn't make me happier, it just closed off opportunities that might have brought me my own romance.
So bring them on and bring on the hope that comes with them - I’m ready.
PS: For the sake of transparency - it’s not all soul searching in the journey back to romance movies. Part is definitely due to a slight crush on Ryan Paevey ;)
Publisher A Beautiful Life Magazine